"This is just another excuse a dude will use to go dutch"
She's got her own so she don't need mine. Oh please. *eyeroll* Lol.
Is that wrong to think? *shrugs*
... to be continued
Monday, October 31, 2011
A Cynic's Thoughts - She's Got Her Own
Was listening to this song earlier today and the first thing to pop into my head;
She's got her own so she don't need mine. Oh please. *eyeroll* Lol.
Is that wrong to think? *shrugs*
... to be continued
She's got her own so she don't need mine. Oh please. *eyeroll* Lol.
Is that wrong to think? *shrugs*
... to be continued
Sunday, October 30, 2011
A Cynic's Thoughts
I think I'm becoming a cynic. I've been watching sappy movies all night and all it keep thinking is... That's a load of bulls#@%!
I don't want to think like that but for me my love life has yet to have that happy ending which makes me wonder if it only happens in books and movies and to everyone who is not Lady Dee. Lol.
I've always been critical but my cynicism is increasing, sigh, and I don't like it. Oh well.
... to be continued
I don't want to think like that but for me my love life has yet to have that happy ending which makes me wonder if it only happens in books and movies and to everyone who is not Lady Dee. Lol.
I've always been critical but my cynicism is increasing, sigh, and I don't like it. Oh well.
... to be continued
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Mail-Order Husband
So, in the crazy recesses of my mind. I've been thinking about the possibility of advertising for a mail-order husband.
Its crazy I know. I've been reading a lot of stories about mail-order brides recently. I'm fascinated by history and I have come to feel a kinship with these women in these stories. So of them fictitious and some of them real. They are ladies who felt unwanted, past their time, unpretty, plain or damaged, and lack confidence; like this was their last hope.
I've felt all these things on more than one occassion. I sympathize with these women who put all their hopes and dreams on a man they had never met and barely knew but for a few letters. This I know but sometimes when your at the wits end... you do some crazy things.
Maybe... I don't know. Sometimes I think I'm losing my mind over this marriage and babies stuff. Sometimes when you want something so bad it starts to consume you.
My biggest fear is making a decision out of desperation. Marriage for me is forever. Its a big decision that I have to live with til I die. I want to make the best choices possible but my choices feel limited and that makes me anxious. Gosh, sometimes I wish I was a man.
...to be continued.
Its crazy I know. I've been reading a lot of stories about mail-order brides recently. I'm fascinated by history and I have come to feel a kinship with these women in these stories. So of them fictitious and some of them real. They are ladies who felt unwanted, past their time, unpretty, plain or damaged, and lack confidence; like this was their last hope.
I've felt all these things on more than one occassion. I sympathize with these women who put all their hopes and dreams on a man they had never met and barely knew but for a few letters. This I know but sometimes when your at the wits end... you do some crazy things.
Maybe... I don't know. Sometimes I think I'm losing my mind over this marriage and babies stuff. Sometimes when you want something so bad it starts to consume you.
My biggest fear is making a decision out of desperation. Marriage for me is forever. Its a big decision that I have to live with til I die. I want to make the best choices possible but my choices feel limited and that makes me anxious. Gosh, sometimes I wish I was a man.
...to be continued.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
When Your Heart Won't Listen to Your Head
Washington won't let me go.
I'm going through the cycle in my life when the desire to be married is really strong. Its usually once a month that this really strong urge comes along to be coupled up and it sucks because that's when you make bad decisions.
And Washington won't let me go.
I really don't need this right now. I am so tired. I need to meet the right man and my heart wants that person but sometimes our heart can be clouded by our desires so I need to keep my head clear. This is the time of no compromises.
But he won't let me go... ugh
... to be continued
I'm going through the cycle in my life when the desire to be married is really strong. Its usually once a month that this really strong urge comes along to be coupled up and it sucks because that's when you make bad decisions.
And Washington won't let me go.
I really don't need this right now. I am so tired. I need to meet the right man and my heart wants that person but sometimes our heart can be clouded by our desires so I need to keep my head clear. This is the time of no compromises.
But he won't let me go... ugh
... to be continued
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Hot-Blooded Italian
Oh chile my office just got a lot more sexy. A few weeks ago a new guy started in the research department at my foundation. Fresh off the boat is this fine as hell Italian god. I ain't even lying, every woman in my office done swooned when he started and when he smiles at you... thats probably how he gets women to drop their pants... that smile.
Anyway, he is tall gorgeous smile, great teeth, black hair with gray at the temples (I love my older men), long legs *sigh*. And the accent, Oh the ACCENT. Every time I see him I'm like, "Damn, he's fine". Wow, he's a nice distraction in the middle of the day.
Wish I could take a picture to share with all of y'all but I think he would become a little suspicious if I just snapped a photo of him. Lol.
Just thought I'd share. I gotta make a trip to Italy. They say Italian men are fine and after seeing an Italian Native up close I am convinced!
... to be continued
Anyway, he is tall gorgeous smile, great teeth, black hair with gray at the temples (I love my older men), long legs *sigh*. And the accent, Oh the ACCENT. Every time I see him I'm like, "Damn, he's fine". Wow, he's a nice distraction in the middle of the day.
Wish I could take a picture to share with all of y'all but I think he would become a little suspicious if I just snapped a photo of him. Lol.
Just thought I'd share. I gotta make a trip to Italy. They say Italian men are fine and after seeing an Italian Native up close I am convinced!
... to be continued
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
I Know You Mad But...
Do you have to speak in a raised voice while talking on you phone at the entrance of the subway during rush hour so that everyone knows your boyfriend cheated on you and got the other girl pregnant?
You mad but Wow. He told her old girl poked holes in the condom like that's an excuse for cheating. SMH.
By the way it is not eavesdropping if the person is talking loud enough for 30+ people to hear.
But anyway, c'mon we get it he's a douche now take your conversation to your house.
... to be continued.
You mad but Wow. He told her old girl poked holes in the condom like that's an excuse for cheating. SMH.
By the way it is not eavesdropping if the person is talking loud enough for 30+ people to hear.
But anyway, c'mon we get it he's a douche now take your conversation to your house.
... to be continued.
MyLife.com
Was watching a comercial on TV. You know the one's where they say, "Look whose searching for you today. You don't want to miss out" or something like that. I usually don't do this cuz its just a ploy to get your email and spam you to death but I caved (Thank God I have a junk email address). I signed up for free, they be tripping thinking I'm gonna pay for this. And guess what?
Ain't no one looking for Lady Dee. :(
Why this made me feel some type of way? Lol. Why do we put so much importance on being "looked for" on these sites? Of course we want people to seek us out. Its something to do with our ego and the desire to be wanted or thought about even if we don't want and/or aren't thinking about the person wanting/thinking about us. Its how we're wired.
It shouldn't matter but it does. Life is funny that way.
... to be continued
Ain't no one looking for Lady Dee. :(
Why this made me feel some type of way? Lol. Why do we put so much importance on being "looked for" on these sites? Of course we want people to seek us out. Its something to do with our ego and the desire to be wanted or thought about even if we don't want and/or aren't thinking about the person wanting/thinking about us. Its how we're wired.
It shouldn't matter but it does. Life is funny that way.
... to be continued
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Do You Miss Me?
I hate when a guy asks me that. What am I gonna say, "No"? Really? Maybe I should, just to throw them off. I mean really, you want me to yes so I say yes. If I miss you I'll tell you. You fishing and it puts me on the spot.
I don't like it.
... to be continued
I don't like it.
... to be continued
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Lacking Trust
I'm not very trusting. (Understatement of the century). I've been hurt. People who I don't know who try to play me I don't really care what they got to say. You don't like me, that's fine. I'll live. The thing is I've been hurt one too many times by folks who are supposed to have my back.
Maybe thats why guys don't really approach me. I can be standoffish because I'm always waiting to find out what their agenda is, what they want from me. I'm a cool chick and loyal to a fault but I have to deem you worthy of that trust. Now I'm very selective of who those people are, I wish I was more selective when I was younger.
In any case, trust is a huge issue for me. I'm sure many can relate. It causes me to wait for the other shoe to drop in all of my relationships. My track record of break-ups to get back with exes, secret wives, when I really like someone I'm always waiting for the relationship to fall apart like it has in the past.
I'm SCARED. I'ma be honest. I hate dating because I'm scared to fall in love only to have the bottom drop out of my relationships. It seems almost inevitable. People's word nowadays is like garbage. Its crazy.
But you can't love if you can't trust. And I can't get married unless I find a man I love. I'm a work in progress. It means letting go and not leaning on my own understanding. God is in control. Hopefully, I let Him take the lead instead of trying to make something, that I should walk away from, work.
... to be continued
Maybe thats why guys don't really approach me. I can be standoffish because I'm always waiting to find out what their agenda is, what they want from me. I'm a cool chick and loyal to a fault but I have to deem you worthy of that trust. Now I'm very selective of who those people are, I wish I was more selective when I was younger.
In any case, trust is a huge issue for me. I'm sure many can relate. It causes me to wait for the other shoe to drop in all of my relationships. My track record of break-ups to get back with exes, secret wives, when I really like someone I'm always waiting for the relationship to fall apart like it has in the past.
I'm SCARED. I'ma be honest. I hate dating because I'm scared to fall in love only to have the bottom drop out of my relationships. It seems almost inevitable. People's word nowadays is like garbage. Its crazy.
But you can't love if you can't trust. And I can't get married unless I find a man I love. I'm a work in progress. It means letting go and not leaning on my own understanding. God is in control. Hopefully, I let Him take the lead instead of trying to make something, that I should walk away from, work.
... to be continued
Note to Self
Never ever, ever, EVER again give your number to a man unless you absolutely, positively want to get to know him better. Otherwise, tell him no. This way you will avoid the situation you are in now.
That is all.
... to be continued.
That is all.
... to be continued.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
The Settlement
In my list of long-term goals I should be engaged at some point in the next 6-9 months. Obviously, at the rate my love life is going that ain't happening. I'm starting to feel anxiety creeping up on me. When you feel anxiety you start to SETTLE. Of all the words in the English language this has to be one of the scariest for me.
Historically, in my relationships I put my guys needs, wants, desires not just ahead of my own but I throw mine out the window because I don't want him to leave me. Now, I ain't about that anymore. I want to be with someone who puts my happiness first just like I would put his but.. where we don't lose our identity in each other.
That being said when I feel like I'm not going to reach a goal I start doing things to reach the goal. I.e. making concessions where I shouldn't be. I'm tempted to look for my good on paper man. That guy who, when you go down the list of great qualities in a man he hits most of those things. he probably won't be drop dead gorgeous but he'll be sufficiently handsome, work hard, treat you well and he might bore you just a little. I had my good on paper man. And I was on the verge of settling. (I shudder even when I type the word). He had a good job, polite, a gentlemen, sufficiently good looking but there was no spark and he bored me to death. I remember standing at the crossroads of pursuing it or letting it drop and... I let it drop.
As much as I detest settling REGRET scares the crap outta me. I don't want to wake up one day and say, "What the hell was I thinking?". I want to feel good about my choices. That's probably why settling scares me. Regret usually follows it. Though I fear being alone, I'd rather be by myself then settle and regret the path I chose in life. Its a hard balance. I'm trying to focus on God's plan for me but trust is hard especially when the tunnel that leads to your forever is dark and you can't see behind, in front, to the left or the right.
I'm trying but some days and nights settling seems like a good option. Its just something within me that won't let it happen.
... to be continued
Historically, in my relationships I put my guys needs, wants, desires not just ahead of my own but I throw mine out the window because I don't want him to leave me. Now, I ain't about that anymore. I want to be with someone who puts my happiness first just like I would put his but.. where we don't lose our identity in each other.
That being said when I feel like I'm not going to reach a goal I start doing things to reach the goal. I.e. making concessions where I shouldn't be. I'm tempted to look for my good on paper man. That guy who, when you go down the list of great qualities in a man he hits most of those things. he probably won't be drop dead gorgeous but he'll be sufficiently handsome, work hard, treat you well and he might bore you just a little. I had my good on paper man. And I was on the verge of settling. (I shudder even when I type the word). He had a good job, polite, a gentlemen, sufficiently good looking but there was no spark and he bored me to death. I remember standing at the crossroads of pursuing it or letting it drop and... I let it drop.
As much as I detest settling REGRET scares the crap outta me. I don't want to wake up one day and say, "What the hell was I thinking?". I want to feel good about my choices. That's probably why settling scares me. Regret usually follows it. Though I fear being alone, I'd rather be by myself then settle and regret the path I chose in life. Its a hard balance. I'm trying to focus on God's plan for me but trust is hard especially when the tunnel that leads to your forever is dark and you can't see behind, in front, to the left or the right.
I'm trying but some days and nights settling seems like a good option. Its just something within me that won't let it happen.
... to be continued
Open Letter #2
Dear Black Men,
Why is it that most of the good ones are married? So what's left for a single girl when it seems the rest are:
Come on fellas,
Lady Dee
Why is it that most of the good ones are married? So what's left for a single girl when it seems the rest are:
- Unemployed or
- Gay or
- in jail?
Come on fellas,
Lady Dee
Friday, October 14, 2011
Older Men & Me
I like older men. No question. They are distinguished, they've lived and ... I'm an old soul. Now I'm not talking about any run of the mill older guy. For me they look a certain way, carry themselves a certain way, have a personality that draws you in, are intelligent, ooze experience and are FINE!
I find that I don't always click with men my own age. And sometimes where men are concerned, they get better with time. However, I'm noticing that I don't get a lot a play from guys my age to begin with. I wouldn't say I'm model gorgeous but I'm a good looking girl. I'll be 26 next year (I can't believe it actually) and I can't get a guy in his twenties to give me a second look but let a man 40 and older get a gander at me and they be eyeing me hard on the train, on the street, etc. Its a little unnerving.
Even the security guard in my building at work has been macking it to me hard. The other night as I was leaving to go home he told me i need to leave the boys alone and be with a man that will treat me like a princess. Unfortunately for him he looks to fatherly, and he's probably old enough to be my father.
That being said I'm 4 years and 5 months (gotta be precise) from 30. I'm not getting any younger and as I get older this doesn't seem to bode well for me. Eventually I'll catch up to the age of these older men and they'll be looking for women who are 25.
I don't know what to think. How can I already feel passed my prime in my twenties? There is something seriously wrong with that. Maybe I'm not in the right space to meet men who are not old enough to have birthed me. Like I said I like older men but these men that have been eyeing me aren't my cup of tea. And the ones that I've seen that are... are married. *sigh*
So is my life. Looks like my mother's wish that I wait till I'm 30 to get married will come true. Not cuz I want it to but because I couldn't get a date unless I walked to a guy naked and told him to come home with me. Ok, maybe that would work but I ain't doing that. Lol.
My resident older man, 6'8 is a tempting settlement. He wants me something fierce, he's not my cup of tea looks wise but there is a connection between us. I just don't want to settle. (More on that later) I don't love him which for him is okay. But its not for me. Now if 6'8 looked like Boris Kojo, or Sherman Moore or Lance Gross it would be on like Donkey Kong (That game was popping back in the day. Lol.). But he doesn't and I know I sound shallow but I like what I like. And while I like 6'8 I don't like the fact that when I'm out with him I don't want people to know I'm with him.
I did that looooooooooong sidebar to say that I love older men but I don't want to feel like that is my only option and that I have to settle. *gasps for air* You would think I talk this much in real life. I don't. Lol.
...to be continued
I find that I don't always click with men my own age. And sometimes where men are concerned, they get better with time. However, I'm noticing that I don't get a lot a play from guys my age to begin with. I wouldn't say I'm model gorgeous but I'm a good looking girl. I'll be 26 next year (I can't believe it actually) and I can't get a guy in his twenties to give me a second look but let a man 40 and older get a gander at me and they be eyeing me hard on the train, on the street, etc. Its a little unnerving.
Even the security guard in my building at work has been macking it to me hard. The other night as I was leaving to go home he told me i need to leave the boys alone and be with a man that will treat me like a princess. Unfortunately for him he looks to fatherly, and he's probably old enough to be my father.
That being said I'm 4 years and 5 months (gotta be precise) from 30. I'm not getting any younger and as I get older this doesn't seem to bode well for me. Eventually I'll catch up to the age of these older men and they'll be looking for women who are 25.
I don't know what to think. How can I already feel passed my prime in my twenties? There is something seriously wrong with that. Maybe I'm not in the right space to meet men who are not old enough to have birthed me. Like I said I like older men but these men that have been eyeing me aren't my cup of tea. And the ones that I've seen that are... are married. *sigh*
So is my life. Looks like my mother's wish that I wait till I'm 30 to get married will come true. Not cuz I want it to but because I couldn't get a date unless I walked to a guy naked and told him to come home with me. Ok, maybe that would work but I ain't doing that. Lol.
My resident older man, 6'8 is a tempting settlement. He wants me something fierce, he's not my cup of tea looks wise but there is a connection between us. I just don't want to settle. (More on that later) I don't love him which for him is okay. But its not for me. Now if 6'8 looked like Boris Kojo, or Sherman Moore or Lance Gross it would be on like Donkey Kong (That game was popping back in the day. Lol.). But he doesn't and I know I sound shallow but I like what I like. And while I like 6'8 I don't like the fact that when I'm out with him I don't want people to know I'm with him.
I did that looooooooooong sidebar to say that I love older men but I don't want to feel like that is my only option and that I have to settle. *gasps for air* You would think I talk this much in real life. I don't. Lol.
...to be continued
Thursday, October 13, 2011
All Things New
This has been the year of all things new!
I have a new job which I love. The people are great, my boss is great, and I love what I'm doing.
I have my own spot. Yes! *does fist pump*
Its a studio apartment; its quiet and its all mine! My place is bigger than some 1 bedrooms I saw. I've been here since August and its been great.
I'm chugging through my Masters degree. This is my 4 quarter and I have two more after this one. I can't believe it. The next question is: Then what? I'll cross that bridge when I get there.
No man but all the ones I thought I left behind won't seem to go away. Washington swears I'm gonna marry him eventually, 6'8 just wants to spend time with me, and Mr. Feel Good... well yeah him too. I like my freedom but there are nights when... I want to feel a man's arms wrapped around me.
That isn't new but I'm embracing all the new things that are coming my way.
...to be continued
I have a new job which I love. The people are great, my boss is great, and I love what I'm doing.
I have my own spot. Yes! *does fist pump*
Its a studio apartment; its quiet and its all mine! My place is bigger than some 1 bedrooms I saw. I've been here since August and its been great.
I'm chugging through my Masters degree. This is my 4 quarter and I have two more after this one. I can't believe it. The next question is: Then what? I'll cross that bridge when I get there.
No man but all the ones I thought I left behind won't seem to go away. Washington swears I'm gonna marry him eventually, 6'8 just wants to spend time with me, and Mr. Feel Good... well yeah him too. I like my freedom but there are nights when... I want to feel a man's arms wrapped around me.
That isn't new but I'm embracing all the new things that are coming my way.
...to be continued
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
I Wanna Shop
I have moved out of my parents house so now I am on a budget. I love my independence but it has put a huge strain on cash flow. While some people eat when they feel down I shop. I love getting new things. Coming home and knowing that I have a package waiting for me is such a rush.
When I feel down it's my therapy. Lately, love seems to be in my face constantly and I ain't got it. Lol. Its depressing. I feel things I don't want to feel, I wish for things I don't got and envy those who have it. I don't like this.
That's why I want to shop! I miss my high. However, I don't want to be homeless. So I gotta find another way to deal. Any ideas?
...to be continued
When I feel down it's my therapy. Lately, love seems to be in my face constantly and I ain't got it. Lol. Its depressing. I feel things I don't want to feel, I wish for things I don't got and envy those who have it. I don't like this.
That's why I want to shop! I miss my high. However, I don't want to be homeless. So I gotta find another way to deal. Any ideas?
...to be continued
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Ghosts in the Closet
We all have them. Those things or individuals we regret doing or knowing. Those things we hope people never learn about us. Those things we wish we could take back. Those individuals you wish you never gave your number to, those dates you wish you never went on. The choices you wish you could redo.
Sitting at my kitchen table I was thinking about those ghosts in my closet. One of them resurfaced not to long ago. Mr. Feel Good, you can look for him in some of my old post. To give some back story. He's the guy that I was talking to that up and disappeared on me without a trace, and then I started getting mysterious collect calls from jail. I now know that it was him calling. How you might ask? It has been two years and a few weeks ago he had his friend contact me to let him know what happened to him. I was so taken a back it took me some time to get a grasp on what/who.
So many questions swirled through my head. It made me wonder, what type of impression did I make on him to have him reach out to me after all this time? How did he still remember my phone number? Why are you in prison?
Long story short he asked me to write to Mr. Feel Good and send him a picture. Then Mr. Feel Good called me himself from jail and left me a message on my phone. (BTW, didn't know you could do that in prison. Leave messages that is.)
The great debate is do I write or do I bury the ghost back in my closet. The thing is I already wrote the letter. It is sitting in my bag, each day I say I'll mail it but I hesitate. I want my questions answered but I don't want him back in my life. I've been watching a lot of prison shows recently (I have a morbid fascination with prison, crime, addiction shows. Don't know why.) and I feel bad for him. But I'm not that girl. I don't accept collect calls, and I don't put money on accounts, and I don't date men who break the law. But my curiosity...it ain't no good. I can't help wanting to know if he's ok and what happened in the one day we didn't talk that got him put away.
More than that, it made me ask myself, "What is it about me that attracts men who are damaged, projects, or old, like I'm their last hope?' What do I find so intriguing about them? Why do they keep coming back, keep popping up when I think I have laid them to rest? I don't get it. Am I not attractive to those who don't have issues?
Or Is it me?
Is it me?
...to be continued
Sitting at my kitchen table I was thinking about those ghosts in my closet. One of them resurfaced not to long ago. Mr. Feel Good, you can look for him in some of my old post. To give some back story. He's the guy that I was talking to that up and disappeared on me without a trace, and then I started getting mysterious collect calls from jail. I now know that it was him calling. How you might ask? It has been two years and a few weeks ago he had his friend contact me to let him know what happened to him. I was so taken a back it took me some time to get a grasp on what/who.
So many questions swirled through my head. It made me wonder, what type of impression did I make on him to have him reach out to me after all this time? How did he still remember my phone number? Why are you in prison?
Long story short he asked me to write to Mr. Feel Good and send him a picture. Then Mr. Feel Good called me himself from jail and left me a message on my phone. (BTW, didn't know you could do that in prison. Leave messages that is.)
The great debate is do I write or do I bury the ghost back in my closet. The thing is I already wrote the letter. It is sitting in my bag, each day I say I'll mail it but I hesitate. I want my questions answered but I don't want him back in my life. I've been watching a lot of prison shows recently (I have a morbid fascination with prison, crime, addiction shows. Don't know why.) and I feel bad for him. But I'm not that girl. I don't accept collect calls, and I don't put money on accounts, and I don't date men who break the law. But my curiosity...it ain't no good. I can't help wanting to know if he's ok and what happened in the one day we didn't talk that got him put away.
More than that, it made me ask myself, "What is it about me that attracts men who are damaged, projects, or old, like I'm their last hope?' What do I find so intriguing about them? Why do they keep coming back, keep popping up when I think I have laid them to rest? I don't get it. Am I not attractive to those who don't have issues?
Or Is it me?
Is it me?
...to be continued
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Quick Update
Well lots of things have changed in my world.
My fear: That I'll like it a little too much. I haven't been on a date in months and ... I don't know. Life has been quiet but interesting. I've let a lot of men go from my life, I told Washington off and I feel myself wanting less to settle for just anything and really looking for what I want. That's important to me. I've turned a corner. Looking forward to what more is to come.
...to be continued.
- I am single once again. I have been for a while.
- I finally (Praise the Lord!) got a new job.
- I now have my own place.
My fear: That I'll like it a little too much. I haven't been on a date in months and ... I don't know. Life has been quiet but interesting. I've let a lot of men go from my life, I told Washington off and I feel myself wanting less to settle for just anything and really looking for what I want. That's important to me. I've turned a corner. Looking forward to what more is to come.
...to be continued.
Lady Dee is Back
I was gone for awhile and I'm back. With a new outlook and a new approve to this blog. I'm once again single and have experienced quite a few changes in my life. I realized recently that I missed bloggin. I missed writing about the experiences in my life, the struggles of being a single female, and just being able to vent.
This time around my posts will be more reflective, honest, open. This is like an online journal. I may be the only one feeling what I feel or experiencing what I am experiencing but... maybe I'm not. Maybe someone will relate, maybe they won't but either way...
Lady Dee is back.
...to be continued
This time around my posts will be more reflective, honest, open. This is like an online journal. I may be the only one feeling what I feel or experiencing what I am experiencing but... maybe I'm not. Maybe someone will relate, maybe they won't but either way...
Lady Dee is back.
...to be continued
