Quick Update

Well lots of things have changed in my world.

1. I am single once again. I have been for a while.
2. I finally (Praise the Lord!) got a new job. 
3. I now have my own place.

For a girl who doesn't like change since my last post in December I have done a whole lot of it. Its been good and I've had time to think and reflect and I've made the adjustment fairly well. I've found I like being by myself.

My fear: That I'll like it a little too much. I haven't been on a date in months and ... I don't know. Life has been quiet but interesting. I've let a lot of men go from my life, I told Washington off and I feel myself wanting less to settle for just anything and really looking for what I want. That's important to me. I've turned a corner. Looking forward to what more is to come.

...to be continued.

Death, The Job Search, and Sprained Ankles

Your girl has been MIA and her life has been going at 110 miles an hour. The Ex passed away two Sundays ago and its affecting me a lot more than I thought it would. Will be going to the funeral shortly. As badly as he treated me back in the day I never wished death on him. I realized that he was such a big part of my high school and college years. It shaped the woman I am today. Although he would piss me off at times, he was a good person at heart. He was someone I thought would be there as I got older. We would have spouses and kids and be cool and it would make sense. His death and my reaction to it isn't making sense. I've been in a fog for the last week. (Secretly, he was my back up. The guy who if you still single at 35 or so you make a pact and get married, have kids, etc. Someone who through they make you raise your eyebrow at them at times is still someone you can tolerate, is familiar and will give you pretty babies. lol. Now I have no back up.) That may sound selfish but since I was 16 I thought I was gonna marry this dude. Now that ain't even a faint possibility. Thats a deep truth to accept.

My job search has stalled a bit. After 2 months of sending resumes and getting only one interview I'm starting to get tired. Smh. But I gotta be true to the process. I'm in it for the long haul.

And my ankle. This blasted ankle still got me at physical therapy. I'm getting more frustrated as my dance classes get closer.

And can you believe it is almost September? Wow. So far this year had been (as 6'8 says) Bananas! I don't know how much more I can take. This year needs to gain some upside to not be one of the worst years of my life. Wow.

...to be continued.

My Show Was Great

So we all know I sprained my ankle so I couldn't do my dance show. I was totally bummed. I had been practicing the routines for months and I felt bad because I felt like I was letting down the other ladies in my groups, I'm one of the stronger dancers.

So this past Saturday was the show and just because I wasn't in it doesn't mean I couldn't go and see it.

It was awesome. The ladies in my group did great and my teacher took my part so it was all good. I was so glad. But I did miss being up on that stage. I miss dancing. This foot needs to heal up quick.

Ankle Update: That same Friday I went to the doctor. He took off the cast and said that my ankle was still unstable so I'm now wearing an air cast for the next 2-3 weeks. However, this cast is removable, THANK GOD! So I can put it on when I'm outside and walking around and take it off when I'm in the house. I can shower without the fear of getting it messed up. I'm still cautious though cuz I ain't trying to have a setback. And then my doc prescribed me 6 weeks of physical therapy so thats my summer.

At least it ain't broken.

...to be continued.

Updates on the Horizon

My lack of posting isn't because of lack of material. I have lots to say just not enough hours in the day. I have stuff about 6'8, Washington, Ghana, my Workout Challenge, and why is it that so many men keep trying to make a comeback in my life. And I have to get back to my Is It Wrong posts. So stayed tuned. I hope to get to posting quite soon. *crossing my fingers and toes*

I gotta figure out a way to be consistent in here. 

... to be continued

A Busy Bee

I've been living life in the fast lane. Every hour of my life seems to have been a buzz with activity.

So here is whats been going on in a nutshell:

• I turned 24 :)
• It rained all day on my born day but its all good (I got to do nothing but relax and eat cake)
• For my birthday (the following day) I went out to see Avenue Q
• The following week Washington took me out for my aforementioned birthday (why is he so cute?)
• 6'8 feels that I'm neglecting him
• The screen on my phone froze (its touch screen) so I got locked out of my phone, lost all my contacts and can't figure out how to post to my blog again thru text because I LOST ALL MY CONTACTS!
• Mr. Smith, T-Bear, the MC, and Honey have all tried to make a comeback
• My "pay you for pictures" friend proposed that we date each other!
• Skittles, Lord have mercy, continues to express his undying love for me and started to kick it up a notch (I really don't need that right now)
• Work is killing me ( a friend joking told me I should just move into my office *sad face*)
• My sister wants me to move to Texas with her
• I've been planning youth activities for the last month and I'm exhausted
• And after my last doctor's visit I have a clean bill of health but I could stand to lose a few pounds (maybe that's why my jeans nowadays are fitting a little snug)

So yep, that's it, I think. Will hopefully be posting more soon. I need a serious vacation. I need more ME time.

What's up with everyone else?

... to be continued. 

I Wanna Be Your Man

This song takes me back to a school dance in Love and Basketball. A lot of my posts have been songs as of late. Hmmm. *shrugs* Ok, so I have an interesting situation right about now.

I'm talking to the Personal Trainer (PT) on Saturday and he tells me that if we weren't being held apart by distance I'd be his woman. Awh, that sucks. Cuz we are, we still talk everyday but I'm in NY and he's in Georgia. Where is the justice?

In the mean time, new prospect intro coming, I've been talking to Washington (he's a Redskins fan). I actually started talking to him before I started talking to the Personal Trainer but PT has stolen my heart. Anyway, he really seems to be feeling me and we also talk everyday. Now, I like him too but some how talking to him feels like I'm cheating on PT or at the very least being dishonest. I'm not that type of girl and I hate that feeling.

Also this passed Saturday, Mr. E emailed me (of course not answering my email) but why did my heart go all a flutter again and I was ready to forgive him all things? *smh* What the heck is wrong with me?

The MC hits me up that same Saturday talking about, come over and cuddle and watch movies with me. Honey is still lurking in the shadows trying to make something happen even if its by sheer force of will and I'm just like "What is going?"

But what takes the cake is today my friend, Poppa, hit me with the I should be your man, your should be my woman pitch. Adding in at the end, "You should give this young guy a shot." Now we have been hanging out a lot more lately and I did start to feel these vibes he was sending my way (We ladies always know when a dude is trying to make a play for us. We get this sense that somethings changed.) but I was hoping and praying that what happened wouldn't happen. Now he didn't just come out and say it but... I'll explain more in a later post.

Can you see my interesting position. I'm getting all these vibes that they all want me in some way. A confidant, lover, ride or die chick, friend. Some of them are a lot more vocal and clear than others about what they want but all in all they seem to be saying the same thing, I wanna be your man. I wanted just one guy but I'm finding myself with more than one guy wanting to be with me. Their actions speak towards that.

I feel like all of them expect me to say "Yes, I'll be with you and only you". They have all gotten used to me being there, answering them, talking with them, vibing with them but I chalk that up to me being a friend.

The three I really like are the Personal Trainer, Washington, and Mr. E. And to be honest if PT lived in NY this wouldn't even be an issue. And if Mr. E wasn't so busy this scenario wouldn't exist at all but anyway. I could be a girlfriend to any one of these men and potential be happy for a time but I want to be with the right one not just anyone. So I want to take my time making my decision.

2 issues arise from this

1. They may not want to wait. Which means I could miss out on that guy or if I make a hasty decision I could pick the wrong guy.
2. Once I decide he may say, "You know wat, on second thought, you're not the one for me".

*sigh* The last thing I want is hurt feelings on all sides. I don't know why I thought this would be easy.

Singleville... *smh*

...to be continued

The Way You Make Me Feel

This is my 100th post. I'm so stoked. Can't believe I've been blogging this long.

Who gets the honor of being the topic of my 100th post? The Personal Trainer.

I know that he's my text buddy but recently we turned up the heat a bit. He makes me feel...sexy, beautiful, wanted, desired. *sigh* I think Michael said it best

The way you make me feel
(the way you make me feel)
You really turn me on
(you really turn me on)
You knock me off of my feet
(you knock me off of My feet)
My lonely days are gone
(my lonely days are gone)

Now I know this is bad cuz I feeling him way too much. I'm just trying to wrap my head around how this could even work. When you look at this logically it can't. There are so many obstacles to this but it seems I can't fight the feeling and when a guy tells you,

I am so open. All I want is u.

What is a girl to do? Our text exchanges have heated up, we talk everyday, I go to sleep thinking about him, I wake up thinking about him. Lord have mercy. This is more than just a full blown crush. And the pictures he sends. Mercy.

But he's so far away :(

Why is it that every time I find a guy that I'm really into for some reason I can't have him? This is so frustrating. The ones I don't want are always available to me, but the ones I do want have obstacles like kids my age and being a workaholic and being in another freaking state. (Girl breath)

If I fall for this guy its my own fault but like that R. Kelly song...

My mind’s telling me no
But my body, my body's telling me yes

Why is everything always so complicated with me? Singleville is a mix of bliss and misery right now. But I'm really floating high on the bliss at this point. The misery will come eventually (although I definitely hope not).

... to be continued

The Ex, the MC, and Mr. E

This will be a relatively short post. Let me see if I can pull this off.

Saw The Ex last weekend. Tell me why homeboy was surprised that I didn't give him a hug and instead gave him a pat on the back. Sweetie, we are not bffs. Fool done lost his mind.

Saw the MC Monday and had to give him the "I think we should be just friends" speech. It totally sucked. He's still talking to me but ...I miss the comfort that came with that relationship. But I had to. Everything was moving so fast and I just couldn't get past his kid being 3 years younger than me. I had to end it before we got too attached.

Times Up! Mr. E's deadline to reply has come and gone. I have moved him to the friend category and that's how he will stay. He will always have a special place in my heart but if he's not ready your girl's got to move on.

Three strikes :-/ Am I out? SMH

... to be continued

Collect Calls

I figured out who the collect calls are coming from. I got another one over the weekend. I didn't accept it of course but now (this is like the third one) I need to find out who the heck is blowing up my phone from jail. At first I thought they were from Trig but then I saw the area code of the number and looked it up. Its for upstate NY. Trig is in NC. So its not him. The last person I was talking to who was upstate was ...Mr. Feel Good.

Remember I said that he just seemed to disappear with no explanation.

So... Mr. Feel Good Disappearing + Collect calls from an inmate from Upstate NY = Mr. Feel Good in the clink

And Lady Dee is saying ... boy are you crazy. I ain't your girlfriend, baby momma, or even your sex buddy. I'm not even a hook up. Why are you calling me?! Sure I wanted to know what happened to him (I know now) but what do you want me to do for you? I'm not coming to visit and I'm not sending you money so...

In any event at least I now know what happened but these guys man. SMH. Get it together.

... to be continued

Lurking in the Shadows

I know I've been talking a lot about the MC lately but there are still others trying to make a play for this single girl so its time for some updates.

1. Mr. Smith - We are just friends. I've been checking in on him every now and again and I think we are in a good place.
2. Mr. Feel Good has disappeared. Literally. I don't know what happened. HE want from hitting me up everyday to nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. I hit him up twice to see whats up. No answer. *shrug* Oh well. I hope he's ok.
3. Honey - He almost lost his spot with me. Would call him. No answer. Then would call me mad late at night and ask me why was I up? (huh?) So finally I stopped hitting him up. Miracle of miracles. He's back. Wants to hang and talk. He's getting a little bit of a side eye but we'll see. He's dug himself a serious hole.
4. Spike has been trying to get back in my world something fierce recently. Like very recent. Sending me texts talking bout, he just checking in after not taking to me for weeks. Then today he laid it on real thick. Wants to see me real bad apparently. The question is, do I want to see him? We'll know by the end of tonight.

On another note, tell me why one day I was checking my voicemail and it seemd I got a collect call from some county jail talking about my limit is up and I have to setup an account to receive anymore. WTF? Who in the hell is calling me collect from jail? I was so taken aback by that I had to laugh. Whoever it was you done called the wrong girl. I can't help you.

Singleville, I knew that after last week's quietness this week was gonna be crazy but man this is NUTS. I'm told I think I love you and my lurkers are coming out of the shadows. *smh*
What is Singleville gonna throw at me next?

... to be continued.

I Wanna Be With You

I wanna be with you

If only for a night

To be the one whose in your arms

Who holds you tight

I wanna be with you

There`s nothing more to say

There`s nothing else I want more than to feel this way

I wanna be with you

That Mandy Moore song is old but is so beautiful and captures an emotion that all people want to hear from another person. "I wanna be with you baby." I know I do. (I still remember how it made me feel back when I was a nerdy teen in high school.)

Last night in Singleville was an interesting night. Skittles calls me. (see Young Bucks on the Come Up ) Now when he does he usually gets me frustrated because he doesn't like to annouce himself. Now I always know who it is but its annoying. (I view it like a like kid game he like to play with me and it always reminds of the fact that he's still young) Your probably wondering why I don't just save his number in my phone. He doesn't have a phone so he calls me from all these random numbers. Saving any one of the numbers he calls me from would be useless and a waste of time.

Anyway, we usually don't get into anything deep when he calls. He tells me he loves me. I tell him ok, whatever you say. This goes on for a few minutes and then we hang up. (Ok I hang up) I know your thinking, "Man she's a bish to him." The thing is I've been hearing this song and dance for almost as long as I've known him. I've never taken it seriously because I just thought it was a little boyhood crush that I thought he'd grow out of. (He met me when he was 13 and I was 18.)

But last night, although that is how I thought the conversation would go, that's not how it went at all. Of course he said to me, "You know I love you right?" And I obligingly say yes. And then he says, "Why can't we be together?" He's asked me this a million times and I've given him the same answer a million times but last night he wouldn't let it go. Then he asks, "If we were the same age would we be together?" Crap. The one question I had hoped he'd never ask me. I had to answer truthly. And the answer is that its a strong possibility. Now I can't make any promises that it would be the case but if we were on equal footing I would seriously consider it. I shoulda told him know. But its just not in me to lie. And that would be a big lie.

The thing with Skittles is that I know that he wants to be with me and that he would treat me right. However, he has so much instability. He is still a kid (which is evidenced in some of the things he says) and while thats all good I haven't been a "kid" for a while now. My mindset and outlook has always been a mature one and I just don't think we are on the same level.

Trying to convey this to someone who says that they've loved you since the first time they saw you is an impossible task. He is still set on being with me and marrying me. I almost died when he told me that he wanted me to wait 7 years for him so that we could get married. In 7 years I'll be 30. And while its possible that I might still be single by then. That is not my goal nor my hope.

I guess for me, I'm just trying to understand why he wants to be with me with such intensity. What does he feel I will give him? Why does he give me such loyalty? It a little baffling to me, especially after some of the things he told me. He treats me with a lot more respect than all of the females he deals with. (he treat those other girls a little doggish :-/) Its almost like reverence. I don't want to be on anyone's pedestal because I will most assuredly fall off. So I asked him, "What happens when you get tired of me? What happens when I get old?" He said he'd never get tired of me and to him I'm not old *sigh*

Oh, boy. What girl doesn't what to hear that? Who doesn't want to be loved like that? But I've said it before and I'll say it again. You can't live on love alone. I wish you could but you can't and I need stability. I thrive on stability. I need someone I can lean on because so many lean on me. He is such a gray area. Nothing with him is black and white. And just the thought of teetering and struggling makes my palms sweat and my heart race. The only thing I could tell him is that if were meant to be God will make a way. (Cuz right now I can't see us together) He said he's been praying for that for the last 5 years. Lord have mercy. Would it be wrong of me to pray the opposite of his prayer? Yeah that's what I thought.

Now while I'm talking to Skittles I'm texting Mr. Feel Good. Now he is still in the friend category but we've been talking a lot lately. Like I've said before he is incredibly sweet and recently we've shared with each other some of our plans for the future. (I love a man with goals) Which was really nice. So last night were texting and I start to see him use possessive language. Basically saying your mine. This was kinda out of left field so I say, "I'm your?" And he says yes.

Ok...ummm. Then he asks me, "Are you my lady?" Whoa. Now I'm put on the spot. Both on the phone and thru text I'm being told I wanna be with you. And I'm speechless. I haven't even met Mr. Feel Good in person yet so how can I know if I'm his lady? I don't know what chemistry we will have or if I can see myself being with him like that. Plus, even though our text conversations are good anytime we have a phone convo some how I always end up turned off.

So last night I went to sleep exhausted and confused. I thought that by hearing someone say "I wanna be with you" everything would burst into color and I'd get all warm and tingly and then say it back with gusto. But last night I couldn't. Everything in me wanted to be able to but I just couldn't. My question is why did my heart ache a little?

Oh, Singleville how you confuse me so. Just when I think I've got it figured out something happens and it says, "Ha! Nope, you haven't figured it out quite yet."

I still love the song though. :)

... to be continued.

Reflective

This single girl has been doing some thinking and some house cleaning recently.

The Experiment that I have put into effect a little over 3 months ago has come to a point of evaluation. The guys I started the experiment out with are no longer prospects for anything other than friendship if that. (I've met some crazies, in case you didn't know)

Currently the only 2 prospects I have are Honey and Mr. E. I'm realizing that I care for Mr. E a lot more than I thought I did. And Honey reminds me of Mr. E in some ways which may be while he has been able to hold my attention.

I still talk to Mr. Smith on occasion but I feel that we are moving into that cool friendship stage. I care about him, I'm just not into him in a romantic way.

Mr. Feel Good is so sweet and can always put a smile on my face but at this moment I can't look passed anything other than friendship. I hate (I really do) that my feelings are based on seemingly superficial things. But usually for me when I nit pick like that there is usually an underlying more substantial reason. I just can't put my finger on it as yet.

So what has the experiment taught me????

1. I've learned that I am a sexy, intelligent, and worthwhile catch. My self-esteem has gotten a major boost from all of this. And while I know that value should not be found in the eyes of man, its still nice to hear. Lol. But I've come to truly love my body (including my big booty, lol), my mind, and the quirkiness that makes up who I am.
2. I've learned I don't have to settle. I like what I like. And there is nothing, NOTHING, wrong with that. My dreams, wants, and desires are just that. Mine. And the man that fits what I want is out there. I need to have faith.
3. Mr. E. I've learned that Mr. E is an integral part in me even having the ability to do this experiment. Yes this was birthed out of a convo with my cousin but before I had met him I had given up on relationships and meeting a good man. I had resigned myself to the life of a nun. (Yes, I know. I had a momentary lapse into insanity. Won't happen again.) The day I met him it was like the Ex who? Lol. And every guy I've met thus far has been compared to Mr. E. (Sorry guys) He's become so important to me in such a short time I couldn't imagine him not being a part of this journey. He makes my heart (among other things) flutter.
4. I've learned I'm changing. I'm being more up front. I'm being more assertive. Less afraid. More sure of me as a women and as a child of God. I'm starting to trust my own judgement again and heeding her wisdom.
5. I've learned that my walk with Christ trumps the booty anyday. I made a promise to my heavenly Father to wait til I'm married to have sex. And it has been a battle. These guys seem hell bent on testing my resolve. What they don't know is that the Holy Spirit walks with me and when my strength ebbs away his kicks in. I intend to keep my promise. Lord Help me.

While I continue my journey in Singleville I'm doing so more focused and not willing to lower my standards.

Thanks so much for following this journey with me. I found that I really love blogging and that its actually quite theraputic. Keep following the journey and leave your feedback cuz I truly do value your opinions.

Well the saga continues for this single girl. ;)

... to be continued

First Impressions

First impressions are everything. When you first meet someone this is crucial. I know this to be true because I've been told that at first I come off mean and rude to people when they first meet me. I can see how this could be true. I'm a quiet and reserved person by nature. It takes me a while to warm up to people.

So I met up with one of my prospects this passed weekend. (See New Prospects) This the medical student. Another one bites the dust. Now I'll preface this by saying that I wasn't looking my sexiest. Dude wanted to see me real bad. Saturday nights are my youth nights at the church. I'm the leader, I don't got no one I'm trying to impress but Jesus and he says come as you are so I came in my leggings and a baggy shirt. I mean I didn't look tore up but if I could I woulda went home first to change. But he wanted to meet up real quick so thats what impatience gets you.

Anyway, dude is mad cocky and started off on the wrong foot from jump. I love confidence but cockiness irks my nerve. It makes me want to knock you down a peg. It was a weird situation cuz I was over someone's house with my fam at the time. Mom, dad and sibs; but I didn't really want him to meet my people cuz it had potential to be awkward. What if I didn't like him? What if I really did like him? So we decided to meet at the corner. (I know, the corner but he was on my home turf and my family knew where I was.)

So when he gets to where I am he calls and I go out to where he is. I walk to his car and I get in and he's like, "U just gonna roll up to my car like that?" Whoa, what? Now he was joking but that ish ain't funny. So, strike one. So we pull over not too far from where my fam is at and we get out of the car (he said it was mad hot inside the car, whatever) and are talking outside. The strikes just kept on coming.

Strike two: trying to tell me I don't know where I live. What?! I've lived in my neighborhood for 21 years. In my current house 10, I know where I live homie.

Strike three: clowning on my religion. Now I'm a tolerant person. I don't push my beliefs on anyone. If you ask me a question about my faith I'll answer it. But don't make fun of what I believe. We can agree to disagree. Thats cool. But I get hot off of ignorant foolishness. Some things just ain't funny bruha. I don't care what experience you had with church in the past please respect me. Its about mutual respect. I could said some choice things about you but I didn't out of respect. See. Respect. I don't believe in church and rituals. I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and yes there is a difference. (End of rant)

Dude's ride is tight, he was rocking all this bling, good looking but he was just mad ugly to me. His personality stunk. He was cocky and arogant. He seemed to be mad into himself cuz everytime I spoke he kept saying "huh?" like I wasn't standing right there and what I had to say was irrelevant. He was cursing and usually it doesn't really bother me but man it was grating on my nerves (expand your vocabulary please) cuz it was these random outbusts. After awhile I was just staring at him with a fake smile, saying "yeah uh huh", thinking, 'I need an excuse to bounce cuz I'm so through. I'm wasting my time.'

That excuse came when my dad called my phone. Perfect. I was like well that was my dad and I'm bout to leave so... yeah... bye.

Haven't called or texted him (he hasn't called or texted me either which isn't a bad thing).

First impressions people can make or break a date. Yeah maybe my appearance that night wasn't noteworthy that night (I've been hit on wearing far worse, trust me) but even though he looked fly he was grotesque because his personality was just so horrible.

I've never before now met someone so nice looking on the outside that was this ugly on the inside.

Guys being rude and into yourself is not a turn on. If the person you trying to impress is turned off by your personality than all that outside beauty is a waste. *smh*

On a lighter, I spoke to Mr. E today. Now there goes a man who made a good first impression. *sigh*

... to be continued

Oh What a Beautiful Morning...

"Oh what a beautiful day, I have a beautiful feeling, Everything's going my way"

Don't remember exactly where I heard that song but that is how I would describe yesterday in Singleville.

It was such a beautiful day yesterday. The sun was shining. It was warm with a nice cool breeze blowing. I wish I coulda spent more time outside instead of cooped up inside working. Ugh. If only to be a tween again. *sigh*

Anyway, on top of the beautiful day, I planned a date with Mr. Smith. He wants to take me somewhere but didn't tell me where. I am beyond curious. Plus, 2 more guy have been added to the list. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Lol. Introducing Mr. Feel Good and Honey. You'll understand the name choices in a minute. ;)


First, we'll talk about Mr. Feel Good. Now I have a lot of web presences. Probably more than most so I interact with a lot of different people on the web. Most are up and coming artist trying to get a fan base, friends from high school, jr. high, family, other friends, acquaintances, etc. And then there are the guys that are trying to spit game. Usually I entertain, the hey beautifuls with, a "thanks for the compliment" or an "I'm fine thanks for asking" and let it drop right there. So when Mr. Feel Good sent me the "hey how you doing" message 4 days ago I responded like I usually do. "I'm fine thanks for asking." He hits me back immediately. So we end up messaging each other for about an hour. I'm really feeling his vibe but... when I check out some of his pictures he has really soft features. His body though is bangin'. 6'1, six pack abs. And he was real smooth. So he asks for my number and I hesitate. So I tell him let me get to know him more and then I'll give him the digits. That's fair right?

So I hit him up online and he hit me back yesterday. We messaged each other for about 3 hours. We were flirting. I mean this guy had me flying high on compliments. Talking he want to feed me fruits with whipped cream. It was crazy. So I finally said I have to give this boy my number. So I did and then we texted for the rest of the day. Why is his name Mr. Feel Good? Cuz if you read some of the texts he sent me he wanted to make me feel real good. Real talk. Some really sensual stuff.

Finally he calls at 11:15 but I was on the phone with Honey. So once I got off I called him back. Now he done built up all this anticipation for me. I have this thing with voices. I like a voice that is stimulating to me. A little deep (but the deeper the better) that feels like a caress when they talk. Make you tingle. I wanted his voice to make me tingle. I don't know what I expected but what I heard wasn't it :(

He is West Indian, which I knew, and he had this really thick accent that reminded me of an old West Indian man. (Not good) While I'm pretty good with accents (I'm West Indian and while I myself don't have an accent I've spent enough time around those who do to be able to decipher words) he talks fast and soft and many times I had to say "huh?" cuz I just wasn't getting it. Maybe I was tired but when I'm concentrating mad hard to get what you saying and still missing it thats a no go. So now your girl is a little disappointed (I know I probably sound shallow but at least I recognize that this bothers me instead of trying it out and us having any argument and saying, "and your voice gets on my nerves too.") I had high expectations. So now I have soft features, a thick accent kinda high voice, and a sexy body. 1 out of 3 :-/

So lets rewind a bit. I had just given Mr. Feel Good my number so now we not messaging anymore (were texting) when a new message appears in my inbox. The subject said "wow". This piques me interest. I open the message and it said, " i must take u out one day". I love a dude that's bold and this definitely qualifies. So I had to respond. I try to be cute and said something like, "Wow? I hope that's a good thing?" So he responds, "it is a good thing. u r a combination of sexxy and pretty. nice smile and a lovely body. and...it seem like u have a nice persona as well". Ok, ok. That's whats up. So he asks me for my number. Now normally I woulda said no because he didn't even have a picture up (he said it was because of his job) and we had talked for all of 5 seconds. Maybe I was still nice from the high of compliments Mr. Feel Good gave me but I gave him my number. Truth be told I didn't think he'd call and he intrigued me so I said why not?

Fast forward, he calls. At first I had no clue who it was cuz it was a withheld number (he was calling from his job) and like I said I didn't think he'd call but then when he told me I was like ok, nice. Now his voice, it wasn't that deep but it was deep enough and it had this sensual quality to it. Like you could imagine him whispering into your ear and it didn't matter what he said (like if he could've said baby, purple elephants are my favorite things in the world) you would still think it was sexy.

His vibe was incredible. The conversation was flowing. It was so easy and comfortable. I felt like we had been friends for years. And then we came to the part of the conversation where I had to tell him I abstain. This is an inevitable talking point in every conversation because sex seems to be such a focal point in today's society but its all good. I don't mind telling but I did remember thinking, "oh, another one bites the dust". So he got quiet a minute then said "oh ok. That's cool. I respect that." I was waiting to hear the phone click however that's not what I got.

Now, I know ya'll is wondering why his name is Honey. The following is why.

So after my revelation its as if the sexual flood gates were open because now he feels comfortable enough to ask me some provocative questions. (Go figure, right?) So he asks me, "Have you ever had honey drizzled from the top of your spine down to your backside and then had it licked off?" I hope ya'll me well enough to know that my answer was no. (even though I secretly wished I had, but don't tell anyone *shhhhh*) So, then he came with another question and another and each time I said no. What was crazy was that each scenario featured honey being drizzled on some part of the body and being licked off. And each time I said no he told me I had been deprived. After awhile I started to feel deprived. I wanted a honey story. Lol. But now you know why I call him Honey.

But get this, those scenarios according to him were rated G. He hadn't even gotten to the rated R chapters. Yes I said chapters. (If you jaw fell open just now then you reacted the same way I did.) So I said to him, "Boy, I'm scared of you." And he said to me "D, I don't know how this is gonna work. I need to stop". He is so right. So the convo is winding down, I still don't know what he looks like mind you, and he says, "When I get off work I'ma text you my picture cuz you probably thinking, he better look good talking like this" Lol. Now how did he know that's exactly what I was thinking? So I say ok and we hang up.

Fast forward. He sends me his pic. (He's French and Black by the way. Spoke to me in french and everything) He was looking pretty good. Chocolate brown skin (I got a weakness for chocolate. Might blog about that one of these days), clean shaven. He told me he's 6'0 with light brown eyes. (Ooh Lawd, don't that sound gorgeous). So he asks me to send him one. I oblige. I only have one (ok 2) pic(s) of myself in my phone. He texts, "call me". Ok. So I call and ask what did you think? He says, "I wish I could suck all the sugar outta ya lips" If you surprised, imagine my surprise. I'm all flustered all I could say was, "oh ok". Yeah, I know. Loser. But what could I say. I was caught off guard. Who says that to someone just like that?

Anyway, long story short (my stories are never short actually but hey *shrugs*) we talked until 2:30 in the morning. Why was this dumb on my part? Yesterday was Thursday. So I had to go to work in the morning. I was half dead all day. Looking at my computer clock. Praying for 6:00 pm to come at 10:00 and. Lol. I'm surprised I'm still up.

But it was such a beautiful day. I guess I didn't want it to end.

Sometimes Singleville rocks!

... to be continued.

New Prospects

Ok, so I took a week off from all the shenanigans. I think my epic fail really got to me.

However, I still have new prospects. (How that is I don't know) But I don't know if I should proceed. One seems really nice. Very respectful but I'm not necessarily attracted to him. And he can talk. Oh my gosh can he talk. Another one is a medical student. Pretty good looking but something is making me hesitate pursuing this. Finally, another 20 year old showing interest. (Ok so he's really not a prospect. I'm holding fast to the no dating guys younger than me rule. Sorry Skittles. lol)

The problem? The first guy really wants to hang out but I'm not really ready for that. The last couple of months have been full of flirtations and dates and learning about these guys and I'm exhausted. Especially cuz all of them were busts. While I've learned a lot about myself I need a break. Plus some of the old guys are trying to make a comeback. Trying is the operative word. So here are some updates.

1. I think I lost Mr. Wall Street. He didn't appreciate my sense of humor I guess. But that's cool. We weren't on the same page anyway.
   
2. Spike hit me up saying, "I see your try to sneak away again". Baby, I ain't gone no where if you want to get at me I'm not hard to find.
3. J will probably hit me up in the future but right now and then, no dice. Friendship is all I'm offering.
   
4. T-Bear calls me talking about, "You forgot about me I see." Boy, please. As I said before you broke two dates with me without warning or a call. Don't come at me with that "I forgot about you" nonsense. Those with glass houses should not throw stones.
5. Mr. Smith... yeah. He asked me to help "make him feel better". (Ya'll know what I mean) Let me think about this... No thanks. Moving on.
   
6. City... was a distraction that I'm gonna leave in the past. Some things are better left alone.
7. My epic fail has stopped calling, texting, and IMing. Hallelujah! Update: I jinxed myself. Tell me why he just hit me up on IM. Then when I ignored him hit me on my phone. Catch a clue dude. I DON'T WANT YOU.
   
8. Haven't heard from Trig in a while. Which is not a bad thing.
9. And the young buck I mentioned before (see Young Bucks on the Come Up) he is pressing me hard. Lawd have mercy, he about to be cut off.
10. And last but not least, Mr. E. Lord knows I miss this man. Wrote him a peom the other day and been thinking about him like crazy but... I'm still a single girl. Yes I'd love to be with him and I've made that clear but unless he wants and acts on being with me a single girl I will remain.

So, as always Singleville is interesting. But exhausting. I need a vacation. And the new prospects are prospects and are up in the air. Do I really want to expend my energy on getting to know someone when it may go nowhere?

Thats the question I have to answer.

...to be continued