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Monday, October 5, 2009

Is It Wrong? - Self Medicating

So, after what happened with the Personal Trainer I was feeling kinda down. In the midst of that came my topic for this is it wrong.

Is it Wrong to self-medicate. People say when you get hurt that you should share your feelings. Sometimes I don't want to share my feelings I just want to feel funky and bask in the funkiness. Lol. However, I have also realized that there are times that I put on a brave face to show I'm ok but then behind the scenes I'm doing things to make me feel better. What are the things I use?
  • Food - this will be one of those times when I eat things I usually don't eat like a half gallon of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with chocolate cake curled up on my bed in my pjs and comforter listening to Roberta Flack, Donnie Hathaway, and company. When I said I bask in the funkiness I meant it.
  • Shopping - this is usually when I have an influx of shoes and clothes coming to my house. I online shop so the UPS guy is very familiar with my address. (don't judge me. lol.) Getting nice things make me feel better.
  • Men - this is when I'll probably start entertaining a bunch of guys with phone convos or whatever just to boost my confidence. I know this isn't good cuz in the past its led me to do some really stupid things. Plus, I could end up hurting someone.
This time around I'm really fighting the urge to medicate myself cuz I really don't need the extra pounds, I don't have the extra cash to finance the shopping if I stay in the funk too long, and I really ain't trying to wake up next to no strange man cuz I was try to make myself feel better.

So far I'm winning on the latter to fronts. Not so much with the food. :(

But, is self-medicating necesarily wrong? I mean if you're not hurting anyone is it so bad to do things that make you feel better to get out of the rut? Sure the extra pounds aren't desirable but if I come out of it a better person, feeling happy is it necessarily wrong to use other things to fill the void?

... to be continued.

3 comments:

JStar said...

Its really not going to change anything, but if it makes you feel good...I say go for it...or find other ways to entertain yourself...

♥Chymere♥ said...

Self medicating is great! and no you don't have to share your feelings. But to be honest, what you're doing to heal yourself is not really "healing" yourself. You are trying to feel voids. Time is the best healer of all so I'm sure your techniques will get better as you grow from and out of that situation. Medicine was created to treat you. so my advice would be spend time taking GOOD care of you. Pray. Work out. Working on steps to achieving goals. Eat healthy. And just start to reconstruct the bangin ass female you are. Find ways to make life incredible.

Then and only then is your self medicating sufficient.

Lady Dee said...

Thanks Chymere. I've been praying and my dance classes have really been keeping me. Focusing on things that are constructive is definitely a good idea.

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