Ok so this came to me out of a IM I got last night. I've talked about the phenomena of the young buck (see Is Young the New Black?) before but it just occurred to me that I've had a few pursue me.
Last night a guy that I had talked to briefly (and when I say briefly I mean briefly, maybe a month, maybe) hit me up trying to rekindle something. While at first I couldn't remember much (I had talked to him like 4 months ago) it slowly came back including how old he was (he's 21). I also remembered that he and his friend had both tired to talk to me simultaneously (see The Last 2 Weeks). That in and of itself was high school games. But I entertained him. So we talking and he's trying to exercise some swag (which was actually pretty good). He tells me he's not in school and not working but has an interview to work at JFK coming up. (Side Note: Does everybody form the NY work at JFK nowadays? Everytime I've asked a guy lately where he works he say JFK. Just wondering.) So I think to myself, not in school, I'm a college graduate. No job, I currently work full-time as an accountant. How is this gonna work? But he's persistant. Wants us to hang out. So I tell him pump your breaks let me see a pic of you. Pic comes. Why does he look 17, 18 at best. That is the end of the discussion. What do you have to offer me? Now this is not the first time this has happened.
Poetry (his writing skills are on point) is a 20 year old who pursued me hard. I met him about a year ago. I love a man who can flow. In our first IM convo he told me he wanted to write a poem with me. Every response I wrote he wrote a counter poetic response. It was hot. It was original and definitely sparked my interest. After that he would send me poems thru email. Alll of them deep, heartfelt, and just plain awesome. Before I know it (like 3 convos in) dude is asking me to be his girlfriend. Whoa! Sure I was feeling his vibe but man, we just getting to know each other. He talking "I can be everything you need in a man. I want to give you everything mentally emotionally and physically." I asked why, cuz dude barely knew me at that point. Plus he was a full time student. I was still in school and working. So what, we were to live on love a lone? He told me because I had been hurt before and I deserved better. (Now I had been hurt but really?) This threw me for a loop. This just didn't sit right with me so I threw him the friend card and he stopped hitting me up. So recently he hit me up again with this same deal. But this time more intense. (In like the first IM convo he asked me to be his girl). Now I'm all for being bold but this don't make sense to me. So I say to him I don't usually date guys younger than me, send me your picture. Pic comes. He looks 16! I'm like, this is definitely not going to work. So I had to throw him the friend card again. At least he saw it coming but he wanted me to say yes I yours and thats not me. I weigh the pros and cons first. I do miss the poems though. Lol.
Finally, there is Skittles. (He is a candy fiend.) I've know him for at least 4 or 5 years. And he has had a crush on me since he was 15. But get this he is 5 years younger than me. (Yes, 5) He has been telling me since then that we're gonna get married and have kids. The whole nine. Now at first I thought it was funny and cute. Until I realized he was dead serious. Everytime he sees me he tells me, "You know I love you right?" Its so bad that every time my friends see him they tell me my husband is coming to see me. (No joke.) And boy is bold. Trying to steal kisses, if I'm not home when he stops by the house he gets upset, he even gets pissed if I have a boyfriend. So when he turned 16 he says, "When are we gonna get together?" I am 21 at this time. Do I hear statutory? So I tell him when he turns 18, graduates from high school, and comes to church. So when he turned 18 last year, back he came with the same question. He had the first, was working on the second (He graduated this past June. So proud!), and we won't talk about the third. This time I told him when he gets a job. I'm sure once he does that he'll be back. While he does look young, he is super attractive. Chocolate skin, athletic build, gorgeous smile but mad young. *Sigh*. If he were older I'd get with him in a heartbeat (Don't tell him that cuz then he'd never leave me alone) but as I said before, what we gonna live on, love a lone? Thats not me. Pros and cons. Love doesn't pay bills.
Why do I say all this. Because these young bucks are aggressive nowadays. They make it plain and they be bold. They older counterparts on the other hand, I've found, play way too many games. (Not all but a lot of them.) They also seem to be more into their careers. A lot of these young come ups through are sexy as hell and can get a girl in trouble. (Watching any college game now makes me feel dirty when I oogle the players cuz I know I'm older than almost all of them).
Now I'm not old, I'm 23, but I've been working for almost 10 years now so when a guy says to you I gotta get my money together and then we can go out and the date is to Starbucks (this has happened) there is a problem. We all know that they money is coming from the allowance they parents give them. Lol. Now I could wait for them to grow up and get older but then that means I'd be older too. (Skittles likes to mock me with this saying, "By the time we get married you'll be old." Ha ha.) But even if I wait for them to get older in age that doesn't make them mentally and emotional older. Dilemma.
I'm an old soul. I love old school music, poetry, history and discussing world events. (I know this makes me sound boring but really... oh who am I kidding I am a little boring but I'm ok with that. Lol.) Not much in common with a young buck at all. I mean I usually have very little in common with guys my own age. This probably explains my love and appreciation of older men. I mean just today me and my sis where talking about Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown and the little boy she babysits asked, "Who is Bobby Brown?" Ouch. I felt so sad.
The thing is I'm trying to get to marrywood. And while it may take a few years to get there I can't imagine waiting a few years for a young buck to get older then wait a couple more years for them to want to get married. I'm looking for a man who has a job (with benefits, lol), appreciates good music and can hold a decent conversation without too many "yo mas" and "you know what I'm sayings" in there. These young bucks are just a tease. Could I get a man with the cahones of some of these guys? You know a guy I can't get arrested for dating or I can at least take to a place that serves alcohol. Lol. To my older gentlemen, be a little aggressive, show some boldness (an not just about wanting to sex me up) and put yourself out there.
This single girl is waiting for the right man to step up. I know he's out there.
Mr. E...
...to be continued.
3 comments:
Young bucks are always like that!! they jump in head first without looking at the bigger picture. I think we were all like that back in our young days!
I've had to cut some young women off in the past, LOL, I'm 35 now when I was 33 I met a women she was 21 yo, she was working, and going to school, but she also had three kids with 3 different men. Now I'll be friends with anyone who is cool, and yes even if she is 21 we can kick and hangout, I'll even show you how those dudes your age are supposed to treat. When it comes to the women I chose to pursue I preferred women who had lived life a little more than 21 years. The reason I had to cut her off though was because after we chatted online and on the phone she got my name tattooed on her thigh and at this point we only knew each other three weeks and had never met in person. There never was no drama between us just some bootycall sessions but she never could understand why I was not interested in a relationship with her. WOW I know I got off the subject lol and got to rambling but talking about dating younger folks got me to daydreaming.
I ain't crazy like that. Tattooed your name on her thigh and she hadn't even met you? I woulda cut her off too. Lol.
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