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Saturday, September 12, 2009

Lick You For $100

So the other day I'm checking my social networking sites. Like everyone I have a few of them. I'm on particular one when I get a message thats titled, "Question Luv????". I'm used to getting all types of notes but this one threw me for a loop for sure. It read:

"WHAT IF I OFFER U $100 JUST TO TASTE U FOR 5 MINS.
IM A MASTER AT LICKING...NO SEX JUST A LICK..NO ONE WOULD KNOW..
CAN I BE UR SHUGGA DADDY ON THE LOW?"

WTF???? I've gotten some crazy propositions before; come to my house and I just met you, what are your sexual fantasies so we can act them out, I'm very experienced if we meet it'd be worth it and all this other ish. I've even gotten the I'd love to eat you out do you want me to? proposition but this?! He even rhymed it too like this was a poem. Fools be getting bold nowadays. Now my answer was obviously Hell NO! But I wanted to know if this fool was serious. (I need to watch this curiosity thing. We all know about curiosity and what happened to the cat. Lol.)

He was,
"SHHH NO ONE WILL KNOW..
ITS A SECRET FETISH OF MINE N ITS BEEN A WHILE"

Can you believe he told me to Shhhh? Like this was some secret I needed to guard with my life. When I read that I imagined someone putting they finger to they lips looking around nervously thinking someone might overhear. Lmao. And I love how he threw in "Its been a while." Did he think that would make me say yes?

I was tempted to say my was stuff was worth more than $100 and see if he would up his price but I just left it as it was and politely declined.

My thing is, last time I checked a woman who sold her wares was a pro and I ain't no pro. Where do men get the idea that this is appropriate and acceptable? I'm the type of girl that needs to know if you can carry a conversation, are intelligent, have goals, etc before I want to know if your tongue skills are on point. Who wants a dumb f*%!? (I mean that literally and figuratively.) Lol.

One word of advice my brothas: Stop embarrassing yourselves. Cuz,

This Fool Done Lost His Mind

As always men tickle me, but I still love them. Singleville amazes me.

... to be continued.

2 comments:

Tha King said...

You'd be surprised, some woman would go for it. Probably some that you know. I think it has to do with the whole "women like a man that knows what he wants." thing. I had to get used to tell my GF when I wanted sex so needless to say, this is out of the question for the Tha King.

Lady Dee said...

Yeah I get the knowing wat he wants thing can be a turn on but to me thats after we've gotten to know each other and I ask. Lol. Not when I barely know u and u asking cuz its been a while since you've been able to get some.

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